Fish never sleep, cranky all the time

PACIFIC OCEAN - Researchers have determined that fish are irritable because they never get any sleep.

"We put a few groupers, carp and barracudas in our sleep lab, and they were positively grumpy," said SomaDat sleep laboratory director Parris Komol. "It was impossible for us to even establish a control group. None of them ever slept."

Cautioning that correlation is not causation, Komol nevertheless concluded that fish would have much better tempers if they would "just get some shut eye once in a while."